Unending Love

It is funny to me the reactions I get when I say "The love I'm talking about is absolute love for an enemy--in the absolute sense that you would die for them to live."
I said this to the youth today, we got to have a pretty good discussion tonight. Agnese and Emils lead everything (and they did great.) Over all, we had a small group. But there was this one person there, that I know really needed to have the word "love" defined for them in an unconditional sense.
After I had said that, I said- some one did that for you. Jesus let Himself be nailed to a cross, died, and rose again when we still hated Him...(though I can't take credit for those words... due to my uncanny ability to forget everything when speaking to groups of people, however small.) This single person's jaw dropped, and they gasped. I mean, really? Never had this kind of love been explained to her.

What made it even better, is that I had needed to hear those words myself. I have recited things like "Jesus loves you" sine I could talk, but tonight those words were absolute reality. And I do mean absolute.
Journal entry after journal entry is related to love.
"Lord, help me love"-"Why do I avoid love?"-"I love mexican food"-"How can I possibly love something so screwed up, how can I love this... me"
All of these things are mentioned over and over again in my own personal leather book...
Tonight I hit a glimpse of that love that I crave daily; and it brings me to tears. How absolutely loved am I? Are you?

Wow...

hey,
I love you.

And in addition

So, I know I wrote just yesterday, and honestly all I've done today has been sleeping. (I'm feeling a bit sick.. well, a lot sick. but whatever) yet there is this absolutely AMAZING thing for me to write about.

Since before I left to come to Latvia, and all through the time I've been here the scripture I have said to myself over and over and over again has been Philippians 4:13 "I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength."
I have been asked to do things on this trip that I could not have done on my strength-emotional, physical or spiritual.
Things like forgiveness, teaching hip hop, being patient (with people and with myself,) and picking up the language here.
All of these moments and more have been done with my repetitive reminder that I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength.

The last day of camp I was given a book mark, with a scripture written on it in Latvian, I saw it this morning and thought I would look it up and see what it was in English...

There it was.

"I can do ALL things through CHRIST who gives me strength."

I needed that this morning, really. Because I have a lot of kids here who won't do anything because they are afraid they won't succeed. I need to continue to tell them that, it isn't them. Ever. And I need to show them how to surrender.

God is good-always good.

Dievs ir labs!

Wow, so sorry for it being over a week since I last wrote anything about Latvia. The past 6 days have been spent at a camp working with kids/teaching hip hop (fun stuff, lemme tell ya)
So many great experiences in the past week, and several new friends to keep up with in the upcoming year away from everyone here. I'll kinda write for you a few of my journal entries from my time at camp. Sound good? good.

Day 2- morning.
We left around 3 yesterday afternoon, two ice creams and one redbull later we are here. I'm excited to start the week! I'm praying that God will give me these dances for the kids. Because, I have a) not done hip hop in forever and b) not taught dance.. in FOREVER. pray pray pray.

Day 3-
The kids got here this afternoon, and they are tons of fun and SO adorable. Oh, I forgot to mention that I got called a missionary for the first time ever yesterday, it caught my off guard. Like... seriously.
I can't help but think about all the time (since I was 8) that I wanted to be a missionary. Now, I finally get called one and part of me goes .. "no.. no not really. Maybe some day soon"
I start teaching dances tomorrow, I'm nervous but I keep reminding myself that these things I'm stressing over I am absolutely not in control of.

Day 5-
There is something about rubbing the back of and singing to a crying child that gives you time to think about all you ever really want. One of Agnese's girls was crying tonight. I suppose she (anna) just missed home. She doesn't know much english at all, and I know very little Latvian but some how there is always a way to communicate. Love. I'm telling you, Jesus had it right when he said (well everything!) but what stood out to me this night was "The greatest of these is love." I remember journal entries from a month ago of me praying for God to show me how to love again. It had been so long since I really loved anyone/anything. Seriously.
Also, as I sat there humming Amazing Grace to Anna I thought about all I ever want when I'm sad. It's always that something I never really get. Most of the time. When I'm crying out of complete sadness, (not just exhaustion, or hunger, or something. But sadness) I want some one to hold me really close and sing me a song. Turns out, that is all Anna wanted too. Go figure. It was that easy.


Day 6-
I realized I sat there around the camp fire singing that I am holding on to soooo much. I'm holding onto the scars, the memories, the sorrow... like... seriously? I walked up to Annija and asked her to pray for me. Afterwards she said to me "It isn't about asking and being given an answer. It is about saying 'Jesus, I love You. And I will follow You where ever You go.'" That is all. This whole time I've been somewhat angry about never getting an answer for those things that hurt me deeply. Or being sad about the very little bits of my heart that were left over from it all. But here it was... so simple. I love You, and I will follow You where ever You go.





And now, Home sweet Latvian home. I got a shower, coke, candy, potato chips and a big ol' comfy bed. What more could I need?
I'm happy to be back, I feel like the camp went so well, and in addition to great experiences and growth in my walk with God, I've gained so many friends. Friends that I can share my love of Christ with.
What a week, and what weeks to come. It is however weird to not have the guys in the flat. So boys, if you're reading this, I miss your presence in the flat! Also, if you miss me just make a pot of coffee in the morning. haha!

Goodnight, and I'll write again soon!

writers block, hand cramps, and little time.

My apologies for not having more blogging done these past few days. A long with our regular meetings with youth I've been helping get stuff ready for the American team to get here!
They arrived safe and sound, minus a few... several... bags on Saturday evening. It was soooo great to see every one! We have already got everything going full speed ahead. The folks are ready for building, ready for relationships and ready for TONS of fun!


I wish it wasn't so difficult for me to write right now... but unfortunately my mind isn't running on full battery at the moment. It's time to rest, tomorrow is a time to work, and this whole week is a time to enjoy!

goodnight, and I apologies again for the itty bitty blog.

Baptism, Kids Camp, and lake day! Oh my!

Since Sunday afternoon the weather here has been perfect! Sunny and warm with a cool breeze!
Sunday after church was one of our (the three interns) friend's baptism. It was such a special day, and it was so great to be able to be apart of this huge event in Toms life.
One of the most touching moments was when Toms and Landry were singing Amazing Grace- My Chains are Gone (not only because of the situation, but because this song holds so much meaning that I can't explain right now) And after Toms was baptized he came back up out of the water and over to Landry and they started singing "My chains are gone, I've been set free..."

Man.... that moment. Words cannot describe the worship in that place.


Monday:
Was our last kids camp, but we did have some new faces! You remember the girls I told you I invited despite being afraid of speaking? One of them came! And she also said she would come next week to Vacation Bible School!
I was really happy to see all the kids. They are so much fun. Thomas told the story of Jesus and His death and resurrection. The kids made picture frames and Landry was the hot glue gun master.

After the story and crafts we all walked over to the sports hall, where Landry and Thomas taught the kids how to play kick ball! It was a huge hit and I have a feeling there will be many more games to come. If I remember correctly I think Landry's team won by three runs at the bottom of the last inning. Nice guys!








Yesterday (Tuesday) We had a lake day with some of our youth! It was a fun swimming and picnic day! with perfect weather. It was a great time to build stronger friendships and to just relax after a long day of work. Our group really enjoyed people watching at the lake and have all voted this kid as our new hero. Be proud!!

Cold Water

There is nothing that makes you feel more alive than swimming in cold water. I mean, seriously.... the feeling of the ice cold water draped around your skin, is A. shocking but B. life changing; an underestimated experience in my opinion. Today and a couple days ago I had the opportunity to jump in some ICE cold water. I'm talking, Baltic Sea cold. And what did I do other than the "Amanda thing" and jump right in. Yes, I know sometimes I'm careful, but when it comes to those 'little things' why worry?

My first opportunity to dive in was Thursday at lake Ungurs. It was a cold and cloudy day, and about 60 degrees. What better swimming weather... right? The second time was the Baltic sea! I was standing there on the Latvia boarder playing around on the rocks, and sure enough I fall in. On the Estonian side. So, I can safely say that I have fallen into a country... and then swam back to Latvia. Quite a simple adventure.

The funny thing about cold water, to me, is that you either get used to it or you shut down. Those are your two options. Our faith can be related similarly. When you dive into what ever it is God has planned for you to do, there will probably be those things you'll have to do that will make you uncomfortable. Speaking.. that's my thing. I've got this absolute fear of it, doesn't matter if I know everything about my topic or not. But I realize it as a small little trick to prevent me from doing these AMAZING things for God. Today I was walking back to the flat from the store and I saw one of the girls who had gone to our kids camp last week and she had two friends with her. I had two options, say hi, (dive in) and then leave (freak out about how cold it is and then run to shore.)
OR I could get over this irrational fear of speaking to a stranger and invite the two kids to come to kids camp on Monday. I went with option two, and I'm proud of it. I swam.

I don't know if they will come or not, but they were asked to come, and told that someone was looking forward to them being there. So, that's my tid-bit. That's what I was thinking about while I was swimming in absolutely cold water. Why let it prevent me from doing something that makes me feel so alive, even with the intense amount of cold? Exactly. "Don't."


So think about what you probably have heard since you were 4 years-old. "Jump on in! The waters great!"

Immerse yourself.
goodnight and sweet dreams!



P.S. (pictures from our trip!)

A Wedding and a Holiday

There is nothing like a good ol' fashion wedding to start off your Liga/Jani day holiday. Some friends from last year had their wedding yesterday, and from about 9 until 5 in the afternoon I was sitting around listening to the mixture of Latvian and English that was thrown around the sanctuary. It really is one of my favorite things- sitting in a room and not understanding what is being said.
The wedding was beautiful, Eduards and Kitija (the newly weds) looked absolutely beautiful! It wasn't like most traditional Latvian weddings (where the groom has to carry the bride of seven bridges) . It was actually more like your average American wedding. One tradition that I think is lovely here is the newly weds putting a lock on a bridge (usually engraved with their names and the wedding date) and then throwing the key into the river. The whole wedding day was very sweet.


After that, and after a nap and a HUGE cup of coffee we headed to Inese's house for the holiday. Inese is a lady from our church and an excellent cook! and if you know me, you know I love to eat. Several people were there and it was great to spend so much time with close friends. We made flower wreaths to wear on our head and sat around the campfire. We got to sing, dance, play, eat, and then eat some more. I have really enjoyed being able to become so close to the girls in the church, and I hope that when I'm gone they will continue the work that's being done here.

flower picking for the wreaths!


Our wonderful dinner!


I call these "cotton candy sunsets"

Yesterday was wonderful, and today will be equally so. I hope for some good conversations and some great experiences as well.
Tomorrow there may be a possible trip to Riga. Since both the boys are gone on some manly adventures I am the only one chillin' at home with Mom and Pops Wimberley. Who knows what is in store for today, once my friends are awake we may go out to find some adventures of our own.
Enjoy the rest of your day, and I'll post again soon!

čau!